Ella's home

Ella is back from Nanny's and having lots of fun playing in her and Emma's room. Her favorite thing to do is make and unmake her bed and she just does that over and over again! She loved all on Emma when she got home and was glad to see her sis. Emma is up on the couch right now watching cartoons and I took the chance to snap a few new pictures of her.

Ella also wanted me to post her new fish's picture. Ella got a yellow fish and Derek got a new blue/black fish. Derek's name is Johnny and Ella named hers Johnny Cash. Now anyone that knows Ella knows that she is in love with Johnny Cash music for some reason, and that fish name is perfect. I also put a pic or two of Violet the dog up, because she is being a good dog today and helping me keep watch over Emma and listen for her beeps. Violet likes to sit on the floor next to the couch to "keep watch" when Emma is sitting there, its cute. She really never pays Emma much mind, just wants to be close to her. Who could blame her? Emma is so cute!

Emma and Ella's new room

In our new place

Well its offical, we are in our new place. I still have tons of things to unpack, but I really really really love this place! I will try to post some pics in a day or two when thing are finished. Every thing feels so odd and new. Derek has his own room, which is going to be superhero themed. Ella and Emma have a disney princess room, I still need to get them 3 posters, but it already looks like Walt Disney threw up in there room! HA HA. Everything is pink and girly.

With a new couch, washer, dryer, computer desk and fridge, it wasn't a cheap move that is for sure, but I am so glad we did it! I love the extra space. I love the little yard, which still needs to be mowed but its perfect anyway. I have a hall closet for Emma's supplies, its the only thing "done" completely in the house so far. Everything fits perfectly.


We are going to have to order a kitchen table, as everything in town is either too expesnive or just simply junk. We need something to hold up to the kids.

Derek seems to like his school, and really likes the very short walk it takes to get there. No more than 5 mins! They have a day off tomorrow for parent teacher confernce, and I think he is glad to have it off, its been a long week. Sleeping in sure sounds fun.

My allergies are still killing me. Emma and I walked with my sister to the Dollar Tree store today and it has made my eyes all itchy. I found quite a bit of disney princess items in there. I was happy about that.

That's the quick update, I will post pics as soon as I get a few more things put away.

Prayer Request and moving soon

Hey everyone just wanted to make a quick post, since we will be busy moving the next few days. I am packing and we plan to move the truck over late tomorrow or early Tue. Derek starts his new school tomorrow, he is excited.

I wanted to also write and ask that everyone please put my friend Peter in your prayers. He is having surgery on Wednesday. There is a link on the left side of our blog that will take you to his blog, go check it out. He is a very nice young man, and is having some serious surgery that could help him a lot, but there is a chance the doctors will have to do more extensive and dangerous surgery. So please pray all goes smoothly.

Ella is over at Nanny's for the week while move and unpack, she was so excited to take Nanny and Poppy to the new house and show them her and Emma's room. She ran all over the place bragging about how she was going to be with Emma. It was cute.

So I will try to update, probably won't do it again until we are in the new house, unless I found time between now and then to do it. Keep your fingers crosses that the move goes smoothly for us

We have a new place to live!

We signed the lease today, plan is to move this coming Monday and Tuesday. The electric company is set up to switch but I have to talk to water and cable and phone tomorrow. We went by to go look inside and take pictures and it wasn't until we got there we realized that we were given the wrong keys! So they are meeting me in the morning to switch them out, and I am going to try to take some pics before we move in. I snapped a few outside today, except the backyard, which needs to be mowed, so I will have do that this weekend I guess.

The backyard is really small. Its ok though, we have no yard here at all so even a small one is a step up for us,and it won't take long to mow! They do the yard up keep in the front yard which is nice. I looked in the windows since I have yet to see the inside, and all I can say is its going to take some getting used to! Things looke so oddly shapped, small, or just diffrent and its going to take some planning and unpacking and moving things around to get things the way I want I think.

I dread packing, but thankfully my Mom is watching Ella for us which will help. Derek can help us and Emma, well Emma can hang out and keep me sane the next few days, and offer me lots of kisses when I need them!

Anyway thought I would post the update, I will try to put some pics up some time tomorrow, if I can finally get the right keys and get in!

Moving

Well we did it! We found a place to move to, we sign a lease tomorrow. Its the one I was talking about in the previous post. 3 bedrooms, small yard, and close to school and church. We are so excited but do dread the moving process a lot! Busy Busy time for us the next week or so. We are hoping to move next Monday and Tuesday so I will be busy packing all weekend. Not sure we will get to move in that early but that is the plan if the lease allows it. They did say it was move in ready so we will see. If we get the keys tomorrow I am going to go over and measure things and take some pics.

The girls will share a room, Derek gets his own and Daddy and I get our room. Oh and Violet getst the yard! We still need lots of things, like a kitchen table and chairs since we don't have one, a new couch, that kind of thing. Our current couch has about had it.

Thanks for all the prayers, I think we were heard!!!

Feb 17 2009

Just thought I would post a quick update on our house hunting. Trying to find a rental house close to church, work and schools, that is in our budget in this town is hard! We found 2 we really liked but they were already spoken for. Darren is going today to check out a duplex that is less than a mile from where we are. Its 5 mins walking distances from a school, 15 to church and stores. Right on a bus route. It has the 3 bedrooms we need and is ok on price. I really hope it will work for us. The only hang up I see is if its too small for all of us. Even with 3 rooms, we still need a big enough room for Mommy and Daddy and a big enough room for Emma and Ella to share a room, Derek well, gosh give him a bed and a few toys in his room and he would be good. :-)

So say prayers, cross your fingers what ever it is that you do that this one will work for us, if not hopefully we will find something soon.

Emma's cold seems to be gone, and she is doing much better. Not too much to share about her, but that is not really a bad thing. Uneventful times with Emma are always great, that means she is healthy and hangin out enjoying life!

Love pics

In the spirit of the day after Valentine's I thought I would post some Love pics of Emma! Notice how Mommy is not in any of them, because she was taking the pictures! But rest assured Mommy loves Emma more than the world itself. The first pic is Emma at the Dr on Monday, getting kisses from Mimi (Aunt Lisa)and the last two were taken on Valentine's day. Derek giving her bunny ears, that's about as close to affection as he will show at his age anymore and of course the last one is her getting kisses from her sissy!

Hope you enjoy. Emma is still feeling a little icky so she will be resting today, watching nascar with Mommy.

Feb 14

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ALL OUR BLOG READERS!

Update Feb 12, 2009

Just a short update, sorry I haven't updated lately life has just been busy. Emma is fighting a slight cold. Nothing major, she isn't using oxygen. She is just grumpy and having to be suctioned more. I think we are on the tale end of it now. She has been sick since Sunday night so it should be over soon!

She went back to have her hips checked on Monday and everything looks fine. The doctor will see her again in August for xrays and will also do one of her spine then, because its getting a slight curve and they want to keep an eye on it.

We are still hunting for a new place to move, and I hope we will be able to find something close and within our budget. This place is just to small for 3 growing kids!

Emma finally got the foot piece to her wheelchair on monday so we now have 2 foot rests. I am so very happy about that. Apparently the guy who was trying to deliver them had been knocking on the wrong apartment the last few weeks.

Ella and Derek are doing great too. Derek recently got his report card and did very well, I am so proud. He was tested for the gifted and talented program but didn't make it this year, but that is ok, most kids don't the first year. My nephew Brandon tested twice before he got in. I don't care if Derek makes it or not, I am not even sure what the gifted and talented program does besides put a label on them as being smart. I already know he is smart!

So that's about it for the update, we hope all our readers have a wonderful Valentine's day!

Hi everyone. We are hoping that some of our readers can help us reach our goal in our March for Babies walk which is in May. We always try to fundraise early, because it never fails that we are pinching pennies to try to make our goal, if we wait too long.

We almost decided not to walk this year. With the economy the way it is now a days, I know that people don't have a lot of money to spare. Then we thought and thought and realized bad economy or not, babies need our help! Over half a million babies born in the US each year are premature. Something has to be done to help these little ones. I did lower my goal from the previous 4 walks we have done, hoping to reach a small one this year, but would love to surpass that!

As you know the girls were 9 weeks too early. Ella was 3 lbs and Emma was 3 lbs 7 oz. both 15 inches long. Ella spent 41 days in the Neonatal Intensive care unit, and Emma spent 66 days, (I think 66 since the days all ran together back then)We are very lucky many babies are much smaller and many stay months and months in the NICU.

The girls will go and get a preemie award in the preemie parade, its a great feeling to hear everyone clap for them. Its the highlight of our year, and just makes us feel like after all that time we spent worrying, that things are finally ok.

So please click on the above widget or the one on the left of the page, which will stay there to help us. Pass this on to your friends if you know anyone that could help donate.



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I am walking in honor of my twin girls Emma and Ella who were born 9 weeks early and in honor of my nephew Gabriel James Lynn Henson who was born still June 9, 2004. I have walked the last 3 years, and will continue to walk as long as I feel I can help this wonderful cause. Many of you have given to my past walks and I appreciate that deeply. I hope some of you will be able to give again this year, and if you can`t that is fine, I just ask you keep me and the other walker in your thoughts and prayers. Our walk will be May 16th this year at Andrew`s Park in Norman.

PLEASE FEEL FREE TO FOWARD THIS IF YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO MIGHT BE WILLING TO HELP!


Contributing to my march online is fast, easy and secure. You can donate directly from my personal webpage with a credit/debit card or PayPal. If you prefer, I can also accept cash or check. Just click the appropriate box on my webpage.

The money we raise helps save premature and sick babies. Premature birth is the #1 cause of newborn death and the biggest threat to babies’ health today, and through March for Babies, the March of Dimes is funding important research to find out why premature birth happens and what can be done to prevent it.

I’ve joined with millions of compassionate people across the country who support March for Babies each year. Won’t you please help me in this worthy cause? Visit my webpage and sponsor me in the march that saves babies!

With your support, there’s hope.

Anyone see "Fireproof" yet?

I saw the movie "Fireproof" the other day, its available on DVD and stars Kirk Cameron. I rather enjoyed it and wanted to recommend it to everyone. While the acting was not super Oscar quality it was very heart felt and touching. A wonderful story about saving a marriage with God's help. I don't want to give it away too much, so I won't share details but I suggest it for any married couple it was very touching and the message is strong.

The came out with a book called "The Love Dare" which kind of goes with the movie, its like the book he is given in the movie. I am going to try to hunt it down soon, its looks like a very good read. Even for couples with a strong and happy marriage, we could all use a little reminding sometimes about "do unto others" and lets face it a good marriage takes lots of work! I think the advice in it would be outstanding for those who are having trouble with their marriage. So check it out and watch the movie if you haven't seen it!

Just wondering if anyone had seen it and what they thought.

Beautiful music and update on Donna's baby

Hey all I wanted to share some music with you. You will have to silence the player on our page so you can hear his player but its awesome music so I had to share. Its by Omnicon which is our dear friend Brian. He is the Daddy to Daniel, the little boyfriend Emma had who passed away. He is also Daddy to a new BABY GIRL who will be here at the end of June or early July. That's right everyone, big update for those of you following Donna's pregnancy. The ultrasound says its a girl! That's her pretty little face up there in the ultrasound pic. No name for sure yet so Ella has nicknamed her Monkey Butt Flower (don't ask!) and it has sort of stuck in our house.

Enjoy the music Brian is such a talented man!

Another snowday

Tomorrow will be snowday number 3 for Derek due to all the ice. Which is a good thing, becuase no sooner did I write that sentence, did I have to stop and go check on him. He threw up.I am not sure why, he is half asleep and says he feels fine. I hope that stomach flu is not back for round 3 on our house!

It has been so cold, we have just stayed inside. Not much going on anyway. I did get out and go up to the store yesterday, and it was a slippery walk that is for sure. A few cars were sliding and I saw one truck stuck.

I am so glad we have not lost power, like we did back in Dec of 2007. That was a mess. Tomorrow is supposed to start melting the stuff, I sure hope so. We got about a half inch or so of ice and about 2 inches of solid sleet on top of that. The above pic is of a plow cleaning my street, just right up the road from here. I borrowed it from our news paper. I am not taking any pictures myself right now outside, too cold!

We should have our last w2 this week so we can file taxes. I ask that everyone please pray or send us good thoughts so that we may find an affordable place to move close to where we are now. We need more room. 2 bedrooms for 5 people is no fun. Emma and Ella will be sharing a room with any luck and Derek will have his own. Too many arguments have been caused by him having to share a room with Ella, its time they stop being room mates. I want to stay in this area so we don't have to switch churches and so we stay close to the stores. When you don't own a car you have to think about all the changes involved in moving way across town! I will keep everyone updated on our search as we begin to look in the next few weeks.

Reflection, four years ago...

I wanted to write yesterday, but got a bit busy. Besides, if I wait until today to
post I can add a happy bit to the story.

Yesterday was the fourth anniversary of almost losing Emma. It was the first time she stopped breathing on us, and her heart stopped. She was a little bitty thing back then, not much more than 5 lbs. She had been home for close to a month, trached and doing well. I was sleeping and Dad got up to check on her, change her diaper that sort of thing. Suddenly I hear alarms and him yelling "Get up now her sats are dropping bad!" I ran and maxed out the oxygen, and called 911. In the mean time her pulse ox machine that measures her heart and oxygen read O and O. So Daddy started CPR. I remember screaming at 911 "Hurry Hurry" and "This can't be happening, I am not ready, I can't say goodbye, I am not ready". I have never cried so hard in my life, or been more scared. I prayed hard, and loud and full of tears that God would take me and spare my little girl.

We got her heart going, 911 took her to the hospital and brought me as well. The police car I was in made it before she did, which really made me worry. A chaplin was brought in, that REALLY made me worry. I finally got into see my baby, they had her on a vent, and she was doing well considering. I remember rubbing her hair and telling her it was ok, that I was there. "Mommy's here, Mommy's here baby girl".

My mom came up, they had to tranport Emma to Tulsa to an ICU there because the ones in Oklahoma City were full. They took her by helicopter. My mom and I went to the roof and watched them take her away. I remember telling the EMT if she got scared to rub her hair, that is what she liked. She promised she would.

Emma spent a week or so in the hospital, with no idea why she stopped breathing. Little did I know it would be the begining of a nightmare for the next few months, until we got our ventilator.

Now I did say I could add a happy part didn't I? The Happy news is, with all the scare we had. On this day. Jan 27, 2005 Emma got baptized! Now I am not sure how I feel about infant baptism it wasn't really how I raised, but Emma's brain will probably never allow her to make that choice herself, so I think God makes exceptions for people like her anyway. I really felt a strong urge to have her baptized, I don't know why. Maybe I felt it would give her more a fighting chance? Maybe I just needed that kind of comfort? I don't know really, my heart and mind were in such despair that day. She got baptized wearing nothing but a diaper, by a wonderful nun at St Francis in Tulsa, she did a Christian baptism, not a catholic one. It was just me and Emma, a very spiritual thing that I can't even begin to explain.

4 years later, I can look back and see that I had the worst day of my life followed by one of the most intensely wonderful days ever. God blesses us at the hardest times in our lives, it took me four years to realize that. He breathed life back into my baby girl, in more ways that one. She is here by his grace, and for that I can never say thank you enough.

The above pictures were taken around the time this story took place. The first one was taken 2 weeks later, on her SECOND trip for apnea. Yep 2 trips in 2 weeks, it began the cycle of 2 weeks home and a week at hospital, 4 days home a week in the hospital, etc you get the idea. The second picture isn't dated but I am sure its probably about a week before her first big scare.

Random thoughts on prayer...

Ever wonder if you are praying for the wrong thing? I was thinking today in church about what I really want and what I am praying for. I watched a show last night on tv called "Prayers for Bobby" about a homosexual man who killed himself after being denied by his family. Not sure how I got to watching it, but I did and it was very thought provoking. Now I am not saying I agree with the things it was about, or that homosexuals are born or not born gay or can change, or anything like that but it got my mind thinking about what I pray for.

When Bobby told his parents his he gay his mother got a therapist and prayed for him to change. To go away from sin and to change who he was to "fix him". Later, after he killed himself she said she should have prayed for his happiness and acceptance . That one scence "I prayed for the wrong thing" got me thinking.

So as I was sitting in church today, getting ready to pray for my daily prayer of "Give Emma a miracle" I realized something. I am praying for the wrong thing! God already gave Emma a miracle. He gave her life. She faught in the NICU and by his grace won, it was his plan to send her home to us. Her heart stopped and he gave her the strength to fight and stay with us. So why am I praying for what we already have?! We already have our miracle.

I have prayed her whole life for God to "fix her" not because I don't love who she is, but because I wanted her to have all the chances the other kids have. No one wants to see their kid with a trach and a vent, its hard. I prayed so hard, thinking like Matthew 21:22 said ""And all things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive." If I prayed hard enough she would be fixed. But God doesn't always answer our prayers like we think. God hasn't made her walk and talk, but God gave her life, he gave her a chance. That is her miracle. I just had to open my eyes and my heart to God and see he had already answered my prayer.

I believe in miracles don't get me wrong. But I think with a realistic brain too sometimes. Emma has brain damage, nothing will ever change that. I do hope one day with God's help she will walk and talk and do a few things, but I know she will NEVER be normal. I accept that, and its Ok. She is who she is, and she is the best Emma she can be. No disappointment from this Momma, just lots and lots of pride in my girl.

I prayed during my pregnancy for two live babies, after being told there was a 50% chance that one or both would die. Again I prayed for the wrong thing. I should have prayed for for healthy babies, or the strength to handle a "bad" outcome. It was God's will though to send me a daughter like Emma, so I could learn new things and so she could touch the lives of others. I accept that and I actually thank him for that, I know that sounds crazy but I do. Its changed alot of who I am for the better.

So what do I want for Emma? What should I pray for? Of course I will pray for continued health that is a given. But I am going to pray that each day is a blessing to her and that she will bless those who she sees or touches that day, including you blog readers of course! That is all I want for Emma to feel continually blessed and for her to touch the lives of as many people as she can. To make people more tolerant of those who are diffrent, for them to accept her for who she is and for them to feel a little bit of her love. I want people to look at her and not see her machines. I want them to look at her and see her as the miracle she is, she is living proof their is a God and he is very very good. I hope people will see that.

Sorry so long winded, have a lot on my mind I wanted to share. Thank you again for reading and praying for us!

New Look and quick update

Got a new look! I know the banner is missing some punctuation before the s in girls, but it was such a pain getting it sized that I don't feel like fixing it yet! But I will soon. If you like the actual layout you can find it and many more at LeeLou's blogs, there is a link at the very bottom of this blog, just click the picture. Don't forget to comment and let me know what you think!

Not much going on, Derek and I went to see Dinosaur's Live Walking with Dinosaurs on Wed. It was neat. The dinosaurs are robotic and very very big. One was like 35 feet tall. We had fun, and went to Bass Pro Shop and to the Myraid Gardens and Spaghetti Warehouse, Derek got sick and threw up at dinner. Too bad too because the food was amazing. He missed school yesterday but is doing better now.

Emma's physical therapist Amy has moved on to another company (WE WILL MISS YOU!) and we have been put on a waiting list for therapy at the JD McCarty center. Once they hire someone to take over Amy's case load we will be going again. That may be summer time. I hate to miss so much, but what can you do? We thought of following Amy to her new company, but its home based and we really like going out to JD McCarty, its a good place for Emma to get out and see other kids and for us to meet and socialize with other parents that are going through similar things as us.

Ella is just getting over the stomach flu too, I think everytime we get well someone else gets sick and it starts all over again. I will be so glad when cold and tummy flu and icky germ "season" is over.

Could everyone please find it in their hearts to pray for my friends the Morris Family? Today is the 2nd annivesary of the death of their son Joel. I know it will be a hard day for them. They are wonderful people and I hope the Lord will grant them comofort and strength today.

"Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. . . . For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee. "
Isaiah 41:10,

Something from a book I am reading

I am currently reading a wonderful book called "Recovering from Losses in Life" by H Norman Wright. Its a Christian grief book. I wanted to recommend it to anyway who has lost something in life, not just a death but a job, a home, whatever you need help moving on from. Its great so far. It talks about not only big losses but losses you might not realize you even have. Please check it out.

In the book he quotes another book which is "Loses in Later Life" by R. Scott Sullender. I will have to go find that to read, it looks good, but I wanted to share part of it with you. I really reminds me of Emma and how everyone needs to learn patience and tolerance of those around them. It is a great take on taking a loss and turning it into a gain. Its kind of long, but I hope you will read through it all.

There is a handicapped person in your future: you! Handicapped persons are dealing in the present moment with what you and I will have to deal with later. Sooner or later each of us will have to deal with one or several loses in our health. Then we will travel down the same path that the handicapped person currently walks. Then we will know their pain, frustration and sufferings. Perhaps if we would learn from them now, whatever our age, we would be better prepared for our own future.

Handicapped persons teach us that life is more than a body. They demonstrate the truth of all the great religions that the things that make us truly human and truly divine are not physical qualities. They are qualities of the Spirit. Saint Paul listed a few of these qualities: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control (Galatians 5:22. Jesus listed a few more:meekness, peacemaking, purity of heart, mercy, hunger for righteousness, suffering in a right cause (Matthew 5: 3-10). Neither of them mentioned physical beauty or even physical health. The qualities that save us do not include the shape of our bodies.

Handicapped persons also can teach us how to suffer and how to rise above bodily limitations. Sometimes pain cannot be fixed, nor can all limitations be conquered. Most of us will have to deal with pain and limitations, at first in minor ways and later in major ways. We will learn new meanings for the word "courage". Either we will rise above our limitations and learn to live with them or we shall sink to new lows of despair, bitterness and helplessness. The choice depends largely on the strength of our courage.

In a sense, then, a handicap or loss of health can become a gift. It never starts out that way. Initially it is a horrible loss. If through the loss, however, we can nurture our spiritual qualities and learn the art of suffering well, then we will have transformed our loss into a gain. We will have grown in and through our loss. We will have risen above our loss precisely by not letting it defeat us, but by letting to propel us forward into a more advanced stage of human existence. Admittedly, not everyone makes such a major leap forward. Neither have some human beings made it past a Sunday school theology. Yet, the loss of health in later life, as horrible as it seems, can be the opportunity for growing toward an ever greater level of spiritual maturity.

Not Double Trouble but twice blessed...

Anyone that knows me, knows as a twin myself I never really thought the idea of having twins sounded all that fun. But what a blessing it has been to have Emma and Ella. They have a very unique relationship and I love watching it grow every day.

Ella is always trying to help take care of Emma, or running over to talk to her, and doesn't think twice about wiping Emma's drooly mouth. She loves to kiss her. The other day they sat on the couch with a toy and Ella moved Emma's arm to help her play with it! It was so cute, and she was very gentle.

Here are a few pics of the girls I snapped.

Remembering

"Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live" --John 11:25

In Loving Memory of Emma's Grandpa Jackie, my dad, who passed away 26 years ago today.